No. 197



There are many qualities that an individual needs to achieve personal success. High on the list would be hard work, integrity, organizational skills and a burning desire to achieve a worthy goal or ideal. Ranking somewhere near the top would also be something we call a winning personality. This is the ability to use grace, charm, humor and other people skills to make friends quickly and easily and to enlist the help and encouragement of others to accomplish our objectives.

What I have shared here with regards to personality can be summed up with these words by the American poet Walt Whitman. He said, Personality is that alone that allows a man to stand before presidents and generals, or in any distinguished collection with aplomb. Since the word aplomb was not in my vocabulary, I had to turn to the dictionary. It means assurance; self-confidence. A winning personality simple means we have the assurance or self-confidence to win other people over to our way of thinking.

To do this, we must be genuine and real and have the knack of making others feel comfortable in our presence. Over the years I have known many fine people who had all kinds of ability but yet they were cold and I was never able to feel comfortable around them. While I have known many others who were warm, caring, sensitive and had the ability to make me feel comfortable, almost from the first moment that I came into their presence. This question please, do you really understand what I am saying here? I hope so because this could mean the difference between failing, achieving mediocre success or being an outstanding success in your chosen field of endeavor.

We can be letter perfect in every other area of our lives, but if we lack people skills, we are going to suffer in some way as a result. Of course, as in most things of this nature, the decision or choice is our own to make. Quite often however, we were just never taught or took the time to learn the little simple things that can make a difference. The word here is tweaking which means a slight adjustment to enhance the performance.

By way of summary, here are some keys to a winning personality that may be of some value to you. Key No. 1-You were created in the image of God and you have incredible worth and value as a human being. No person is any better or any worse than any other person and because of this we never need to be intimidated by the status or possessions others. Key No. 2-Regardless of mistakes, discouragements or failures in the past, begin to conduct yourself as someone who has real value. If you dont already, in your mind see yourself as a real winner. Key No. 3-Respect other people as unique human beings even though you may disagree with their behavior, values or positions they may take. In some ways what this is really saying is Hate the sin but love the sinner..

Key No. 4-Never talk down to other people who are in your charge but always seek to build them up and encourage them to be better than they are. Consistent criticism of others is a one way road to failure. Key No. 5-Smile naturally when you are in the presence of others and put a smile in your voice when you speak. Look into the eyes of others when you talk with them and express a genuine concern for their well being. Key No. 6-Forgive others who have hurt or wronged you. Those who conduct themselves in this manner still have to live with themselves and if it causes you to be bitter, THEY have really won. No person who is bitter can have a winning personality. Whats transpiring on the inside, usually shows up on the outside. In conclusion, I would just like to say from my heart to yours, I want the very best for you. (Jim Davidson is a motivational speaker and syndicated columnist. You may contact him at 2 Bentley Drive, Conway, AR 72034.)